I read this verse recently, and it took on a whole new feel for me ~ don’t you love when that happens?
It’s a verse I know well. I’ve read it; I’ve written it; I’ve said it to myself and reminded others. But when I read it today, what I thought of was an experience I had a few nights ago.
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Our power went out for some reason, in the middle of the night – equipment failure, the power company’s website said the next day. I noticed that the ceiling fan went off, and I guess I noticed that the clock light had gone off. However I realized, I decided to get up and get some water, and check the time. It isn’t far in our house; we have a one story house, and the kitchen is only down the hall from the bedrooms. But it was a long walk down that hall.
It was very, very dark as I walked down the hall, though my eyes did their best to adjust. But here was the kicker: For the past several months I’ve been experiencing dizziness on a near-constant basis. It’s not a problem in my everyday life, and I’ve seen a doctor to try to get the problem diagnosed. It manifests itself in small ways, like if I stand up too fast, or if I bend or turn in anything resembling a circle. Basically, the balance center behind my ear is not functioning the way it should.
And as I walked down that darkened hallway, with nothing for reference, it was hard to convince myself that I wasn’t walking at a severe angle. I never lost my balance, never even touched anything with the hand I put out to steady myself. But everything in me told me I was leaning, or crooked as I walk, and I didn’t feel secure until I touched the island in the kitchen, grabbed my phone, and turned it on for light.
“Walk by faith, not by sight” the verse says. Well, walking by sight was out of the question, as was any reliance in what my own senses were telling me. Faith is all I had, when sight, and even logic were fighting against me.
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Sometimes that’s what it feels like, when faith is all we have.
Light Expectations 