“sleep departed from my eyes”
Genesis 31:40
The only thing worse than a bad day, is a bad day followed by a bad night.
Yesterday was a rough day. I was up very early, as I generally am on Sundays, for my boy’s hockey game. Then we come straight home, clean ourselves up, and head to church.
But partway through church, I started to feel ill. Light-headed and dizzy. Which is not uncommon for me lately, but this was a little different, somehow. So I left the service and sat outside in the shade to wait for it to end, since my kids and my sweetie were still listening to the message.
When we got home I had some lunch, and then lay down for awhile. I felt somewhat better after that, and we enjoyed a pleasant and yummy dinner at my folks’ house last night. But I was very much looking forward to a good night’s sleep to re-center my equilibrium. Or some other combination of words that maybe makes more sense.
We all went to bed a little earlier than usual, but for some reason I was awake at midnight. I turned over and fell asleep again, but woke up only about 20 minutes later. I don’t know what woke me, but a minute later, I heard/sensed/noticed the power going out.
It’s weird when the power goes out in the middle of the night. I mean, it hardly seems noticeable, and yet it is very much so. Certainly the ceiling fan stopping humming, and maybe our bedroom got a shade quieter due to the clock light going out. But other than that, I can’t tell you why it was so disconcerting.
My sweetie was still asleep, so I got out of bed ever-so-carefully, and went down the hall to the kitchen, where I had left my cell phone. I checked the time, and it was only about 12:30. I went to the back window and I could see a streetlight, so I knew it didn’t include the street behind us. And I went to the front window, and looked out there, too. I couldn’t see any porch lights on, but I didn’t know if my neighbors normally had their porch lights on anyway.
I didn’t want to go back to bed yet, because I didn’t think I’d be able to go right back to sleep. I was feeling sort of nervous and jittery from the whole thing. I’m not sure why; maybe I’ve seen one too many TV shows where the bad guy turns out the light in the house right before he robs it. Or maybe it was just that the house was too quiet. Or too dark. Or the sky outside was too light in comparison to the house. I dunno…
I wasn’t up long. Maybe 45 minutes all-told. And I noticed when the fan came on a couple hours after I fell back asleep. But that short time of sitting up reminded me how much I love electricity. Normally, if I can’t sleep, I’ll watch a little TV. But that was out of the question. And I couldn’t even go online to check with the power company to find out what the problem was. {Yes, the Apple of my Eye has a smart phone, but it seemed like a lot of work to try to get answers on that tiny little screen. Maybe I could have just asked Siri.}
So I’m sort of astounded by a couple of things today. First, how much interrupted sleep can impact you the next day. And second, how much a lack of electricity matters in the middle of the night.
I woke up at my regular time today, feeling a little tired and a little “off”. And as I walked my sweetie out to the car when he left for work, I saw two utility trucks driving down the street and I was just filled with appreciation for those guys. Up in the middle of the night, working to get my fan back on, and restore my (slightly misplaced) sense of security.
Most of all, I’m grateful this morning, for light. For the sun, for electricity, and for the peace I have in Him. I kept thinking, over and over, “He is the Light of the world.” I just kept having that beautiful realization, and I’m so glad I will never have to know real darkness.
Light Expectations 